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Kids often start "trying on" different looks and identities, and they become very aware of how they differ from their peers, which can result in episodes of distress and conflict with parents.One of the common stereotypes of adolescence is the rebellious, wild teen continually at odds with mom and dad.But it's important to make a (somewhat artificial) distinction between puberty and adolescence.Most of us think of puberty as the development of adult sexual characteristics: breasts, menstrual periods, pubic hair, and facial hair.If parents have appropriate expectations, teens will likely try to meet them.Without reasonable expectations, your teen may feel you don't care about him or her.When you consider that the teen years are a period of intense growth, not only physically but emotionally and intellectually, it's understandable that it's a time of confusion and upheaval for many families.Despite some adults' negative perceptions about teens, they are often energetic, thoughtful, and idealistic, with a deep interest in what's fair and right.

You also might want to discuss how others might perceive them if they look different — help your teen understand how he or she might be viewed.The later you wait to have these talks, the more likely your child will be to form misconceptions or become embarrassed about or afraid of physical and emotional changes.And the earlier you open the lines of communication, the better your chances of keeping them open through the teen years.To do this, teens must start pulling away from their parents — especially the parent whom they're the closest to.This can feel like teens are always at odds with parents or don't want to be around them the way they used to.